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You know how when you quit a job you'll still get checks from things like, unpaid hours, sick day hours etc., even weeks after you've left. This is something like that. As you know I have given up all of my online dating/hookup accounts a while ago. This is the story of the last person I met and hooked up with from there. It's the end of an era.
Enjoy.
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There was this guy I met online, on A4A actually, we'll call him Kyle. We started exchanging messages one Friday night at about 2am. We exchanged numbers and arranged a meeting for the even more wee hours of that morning. When we hung up from our conversation he told me that he'd be on his way. I was already tired and I fell asleep waiting for him. I woke up about four hours later, the sun was coming up and obviously he never showed. I hate it when that shit happens. He called with some flimsy ass bull shit excuse. From then on I dismissed him as just another one of those online fags who doesn't keep appointments. I didn't even bother saving his number in my phone. He wanted to reschedule but I didn't take him seriously, he'd already flaked out on me. He disappointed me when I was horny and vulnerable and I was done with him.
Throughout the next few weeks as you know I gave up the online thing and was dating and going about my life, learning to be without it. He would call, so much so that I knew from the first three numbers of his unsaved phone number that it was him. If I decided to answer the phone I'd keep it really brief. One night when he called, I was home alone and extra horny so I entertained him. I playfully and flirtatiously told him how much he'd "hurt" me and that "I cried" because he never showed up that morning. You know, spitting my proverbial "G". We ended up having phone sex that night. His moans sounded real good over the phone so I finally decided to saved his number, you know, just in case. I later found out that that number was a house number. Deal breaker! I refuse to mess around with a guy who does not have a cell phone, that's ridiculous. This is 2007. I am not tryna call and have to speak to ya mama, ya daddy, ya little sister and ya Aunt Esther before I speak to you. Nah, I'm good. Once I figured that out I told him that I was not going to be calling him.
After a few more calls from that house number, some I answered, some I didn't, I got a call from a number I didn't recognize. It was Kyle, he called to tell me that he'd just gotten a cell phone. After I congratulated him for stepping into the new millennium he asked:
"So when am I gonna see you?"
Taken aback, yet pleased by his straightforwardness we set up a meeting at my house for that evening.
Late that night he came by. I was ready for him. In my boxers and wearing a wifebeater to cover my newly oiled body, I was horny and ready to fuck. When he showed up that night I noticed that he didn't look so much like his pictures, he wasn't ugly, but he wasn't fine either. He was definitely fuckable though, a six and a half, but at that point he could have looked like the Loch Ness Monster for all I cared. I wasn't fucking his face anyway (well, then again, you never know where the night could take us), that's what doggy style is for.
As he took off his shoes and laid down in my bed next to me, in an attempt to get comfortable, we stumbled through uncomfortable, awkward small talk, making comments about what was on TV, I guess in an attempt to rid ourselves of any traces of nervousness (even a damn near professional like me still gets nervous at times) and to somehow convince ourselves that this was something more than just a hookup, but deep down inside we both knew much better. Once we ran out of stuff to say Kyle turned over onto his left side slightly poking his ass in my direction. That was my cue to grind my dick up on him and kiss his neck. I obliged. He moaned and I felt his body start to relax.
Once I was fully erect I flipped him down on his back and positioned myself on top of him, between his legs. He unbuckled his belt and I slid his pants off, and then his underwear off, and then my underwear off. My hard dick flopped out, standing straight up like an obelisk. I lowered my body down onto his, my dick nestled between his ass cheeks and my tongue in his ear, he moaned louder. I love a moaner. I sucked his neck, sucked his nipples, nibbled at his sides, kissed around and down to his inner thighs, purposely bypassing his hardened dick 'cuz y'all know I don't give head like that. It's not like that was what he wanted anyway.
I slid my palms underneath his ass cheeks, lifted him up and ate him out, wagging my tongue around nice and slow, randomly darting in and out (of course you know I checked it out first). The moans got louder as I wrapped my arms around his thighs, pulling him into closer to me. The room echoes with his moans of:
"Damn, nigga damn, damn daddy damn..."
At that moment he made me feel invincible, like I could do anything. Just then I flipped onto my my back and nodded my head southward, giving the international sign for suck my dick. He took my dick into his mouth, sucking it ravenously, he even deep throated me (any 'ol body can't just up and do that) and that made my toes curl with enjoyment. I lifted his head from my crotch and laid him back down on his back. I hadn't had my fill of tonguing him out yet. After a few moments on his back I withdrew my tongue from him and flipped him over. He got on his knees and spread his legs wide, pushing his ass up in the air, assuming a position I'm sure was all too familiar for him as I did what came as second nature to me. I spread his ass cheeks apart and continued to feast.
I ran my tongue up from the crack of his ass right down the center of his back and right up to his neck. As I pressed my body onto his, my weight flattening his limbs and pushing him down onto my bed I grinded my dick, so hard now that it was ready to burst between his ass checks and positioned the head right outside his moistened, throbbing hole. I whispered in his ear and asked:
"Are you ready for this dick?"
He responded and I reached to my left into the nightstand for my lube and 2 condoms. I lubed him and as my finger explored him it felt like it was drowning in a warm ocean, the warm sensation shot straight down to my awaiting dick, so hard that it was throbbing as I slid the condom on. I lowered my pelvis and hovered over him, he lifted his legs up and his eyes rolled back as I entered him. He felt so good wrapped all around me as I stroked in back and forth.
As the fucking got more intense he started moan and talk to me get louder and louder. Things got a little more aggressive and he started to moan and I talked back:
"Yeah daddy, hit this ass daddy... Damn that dick is good..."
"Yeah you like that? What's my name?"
"Adam..."
"Say my name baby..."
"Adam..."
"Who's ass is this?"
"It's all yours daddy, stroke this pussy daddy..."
Damn, Kyle stroked my ego just as much as I was strokin' that ass of his. He asked me to ride on top so we repositioned ourselves accordingly. As he slid down on top of my dick I held him by his waist in mid air so I could thrust in and out of him. As I thrusted he jerked his dick and threw his head back in ecstasy. A few moments later he came all over my stomach. As he laid down to catch his breath I repositioned myself over him and asked:
"Where you want this nutt at?"
I ripped off the condom and jerked my dick until it exploded everywhere, like a fire hose all over his stomach, chest and neck (don't sleep on those Kegel exercises). We cleaned off and caught our respective breaths, basking in the post-coital glow, while returning to our normal selves. He went to my bathroom and upon his return he asked me for a post-coital snack. Understandably so, as we'd both worked up an appetite.
He wanted junk food but unfortunately for him I don't keep that kinda stuff in the house. I made myself a quick spinach green and sliced turkey salad with a light vinaigrette, sprinkled with Bacos. I offered him some but he declined. I quickly devoured my salad and laid next to him in my bed. He turned his back to me and we laid there naked in the dim light of the television, spooning, with him falling asleep in my arms like we'd known each other all our lives.
A few hours that seemed more like a few moments later my alarm clock rang and it was time for me to get ready for work. Kyle hardly flinched as I reluctantly rose from the warmth of my bed into the cold morning air. I got ready for work going through my morning ritual, not missing a beat. When I stepped out of the bathroom to put on my clothes I saw that Kyle was awake and dressed. He went in the bathroom right behind me. As I stepped into my clothes I cut off the lights and the television. I turned on the radio as I always leave something on whenever I leave the house, a habit I picked up from my mother. Oddly enough, the song that was playing on the jazz station was Joan Osborne's cover of The Manhattans "Kiss And Say Goodbye".
The song continued to play as we readied ourselves to leave. He walked out first and I walked out behind him, locking the door. We walked down the stairs, together yet apart, in total silence. We exited my building and walked through the small courtyard out to the street. We greeted each other, almost simultaneously with a rather antiseptic "Later." Then we walked off in our separate directions. I never heard from him again.
That morning I said goodbye to Kyle but the real good bye was to the internet. This was literally the last time I fucked with it, or rather through it. I fucked and said goodbye. Sure I deleted my accounts 56 days ago today and I'm fine with it, not even tempted to go back, but that morning was the real end. No more random hooking up for me. Wow. it was much easier to let go than I thought. I remember a while back someone had mentioned the concept to me and my heart immediately filled with fear, my stomach rumbled with the flutter of a million butterflies. How was I to live without something I had never lived without? I was always online, I met my first online, and my second, and my third and just about everyone else who came along subsequently. What was I to do when I needed a quick, no strings, sexual pick-me-up, or when I was lonely or when my ego needed a good stroking? The idea terrified me then, but it doesn't now. I guess that's growth for ya.
Even though the sex with Kyle was great, he sucked dick like I like, he moaned like I like, he took dick like I like. But what I can't wrap my mind around anymore is how Kyle and I could do all the freaky stuff we did and just walk away. All of that moaning and talking and fucking was so fake, it was all an act. I wasn't his "daddy" and he damn sure wasn't my "baby". Sure our bodies enjoyed it and participated in it but our hearts sat out for the performance. I mean, hey, you know shit happens, I'm not saying that we should get married just because we had sex but we should at least know each other's last names. Kyle doesn't know a damn thing about me. He doesn't even know about this blog. he doesn't even know that he was the last person I met off the internet.
To read my thoughts back from earlier in this post:
"...but at that point he could have looked like the Loch Ness Monster for
all I cared, I wasn't fucking his face, that's what doggy style is for."
Damn. Look at what the fuck I've become, and what's crazy is how the shit so subtle. I never really saw what a monster I could be until now. Now that I think about all the dudes I've fucked all in the name of being horny, some I know good and damn well I would never be seen with out in the public. Shit, Kyle wasn't bad looking, at least I let him stay the night. What about all the ones I sent packing right after the sex or all the ones who tried to kiss me during sex and I turned my head away. Moral rule of thumb: If you refuse to kiss the person then you know damn well you shouldn't be fucking them. Well this is it. The last hoorah, my once more for the road, my goodbye kiss to the internet hook up. The nutt was good, the butt was good, but at the end of the day it's empty and in turn I'm left empty.
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Playing In The Background...
"Kiss And Say Goodbye"
by Joan Osborne
from the album "Breakfast In Bed"
and
"One For My Baby (And One More For The Road)"
by Etta James
from the album "The Essential Etta James"
and
"One More For The Road"
by Lil' Mo
from the album "Pain & Paper"
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