Well, not to sound conceited or anything but I guess it is what it is... There was a time in my life where I wasn't as good looking as I am now. Not that I'm claiming to be the best looking guy in the world but I'd be remiss if I didn't acknowledge that I'd come a long way. Anyway, it's funny how there are those guys you tried to talk to, holler at, hit up online back in the day and they ignored you, dissed you, played you and paid you dust, you remember them? But then they see you now and their like all up on your dick, in my case literally, but we'll get to that later.
I remember this guy I met online a while back, in the spirit of the Democratic nomination, let's call him Barack. Barack asked me to come by his house and chill with him a while before he went to work, so I did. He answered his door kinda cute, short, lightskinned, petite, just the way I like 'em. He was a dancer too, I like dancers, they're flexible. After some small talk he announced that he was taking a shower. My dick jumped in mischievous delight at the thought that I knew what that gesture meant. When you're chillin' with a dude, especially a bottom, well that's who I always "chill" with so I guess that's all I know, says "I'm taking a shower" or "I'm takin' a shower real quick" that usually means that he's getting ready for sex. I thought we'd get a little quickie in before he went to work. In this case he was really just taking a shower. After the shower he came back into the room, naked and flirty, making sure I got a full view of his ass as he sashayed in and out of the room, getting ready for work. I thought I'd at least get some head out of the deal. No such luck. I walked him to work and that was that. That was until I got home later and over the phone I mentioned to him I was cooking that night. He asked me if I could go back downtown to his job and bring him some of my home cooked dinner. I did, he ate it and I ended up spending the rest of his shift with him. We laughed, we talked, he danced for me seductively. After the night ended I walked him home. As he turned the key and opened his door I leaned in behind him, just knowing that he was gonna let me in. He didn't, instead he turned around, gave me a grandma peck on the lips and never called me again.
Fast forward to December 30th, 2007. Out of the blue I get a call from Barack. He tells me that he'd heard about all the things I'd been doing, namely this blog and then he complimented my pictures. Then he asked me what I was doing for New Year's. At that moment I had no plans, but I certainly wasn't planning to do shit with him, not after the way he played me. We ran into each other on the street once and he's called once since then. I know he wanted to see me again. He was throwing all the obvious hints but I just wouldn't take the bait. Shit, if I wasn't good enough for him back then what the fuck would he think want to do with his ass now? Fuck that shit. Granted, I was horny as shit the day I met him and my mind was on one thing, at least for that moment but he still didn't have to just up and stop calling me. He could've told me that he didn't want to have sex that day, that woulda been cool. He was somebody I would have wanted to actually date, at least from the little I knew then, it wasn't all about sex, but he just kept throwing it in my face. Obviously he wasn't that in to me then and now I'm not into him.
Then there was this other guy, in the spirit of the Republican nomination let's call him McCain. McCain was a guy I hit up quite a few times online back in the day and he paid my ass no mind, just straight up ignored me. I thought he was so fine, but he obviously didn't feel me like that.
Fast forward to a few weeks ago. McCain hits me up online on some "Yo, whaddup? What's good?" shit. Even though a while had passed since the times I used to hit him up I knew exactly who he was. His pictures changed but he looked the same. I obviously didn't look the same, so much so that he didn't even recognize me. I hit him back and we ended up having a conversation online which ended with us exchanging numbers. My plan was to get him to my crib, fuck him, send him home and never call him again as my twisted revenge for the way he rejected me. After some thinking I got to thinking about how fucked up that little plan would be so I decided against it and left things alone.
One night a week or so later while at club with friends, who do I run into but McCain. I saw him, I gestured hello and migrated to another area. A few moments later while I'm in the bathroom I get this text from him: "U look really good tonight." I found him on the dance floor again and we started to dance, well, as y'all know I can't really dance, but they were playing reggae music so all I did was stand, backed up against the back wall as he grinded and twirled his ass up on my dick. In the midst of the grinding and twirling and his numerous grabs of my naked dick, his hands sliding down into my pants and underwear, I realized; damn, now that I met him he's not all that attractive to me, partly because of the way he rejected me before and partly because he just wasn't all that attractive to me and he has a tongue ring. I HATE TONGUE RINGS (no offense to my tongue ring wearing readers but hey, ya like what ya like). He was grinding up all over me, into me, feeling me, I should be enjoying this but my dick wouldn't even stay hard.
After that night he was calling my phone HARD. I mean, yeah I coulda had him come to my crib, had him suck my dick, fucked him senseless and sent him on his way, but why? That would be mean, but what's even meaner is just straight ignoring his advances. When someone is basically giving the ass away and the other person doesn't take it, that must make that first person feel like shit, less than shit, shit's shit. So he continued calling me and texting me "Yo pa, what's good?", "When we gon' chill?", "I feel like a stalker, y r u not answering my phone calls?" He's just not getting it. Well, back in the day I didn't get it either, but he'll learn. I did.
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Playing In The Background...
"If I Could"
by Dru Hill
from the album "Dru World Order"
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Part of me wants to say you should tell him about the past and how he wasn't attracted to you.
And then part of me wants to say as you said "ya like what ya like", maybe what he liked has changed or maybe what you like has changed... can you really fault someone for not being into you at one point?
there was a time i didnt like thick men (thick, not fat, not obese) but now i find thick men with a definition to their body attractive.
So, I think I'm starting to see a trend. Now, I'm your boy. I'm a dedicated reader and commenter here, even though you've yet to comment on my page. So I say this out of the blog love I have for you.
It seems, at least from what you've blogged about, like all of your experiences with men are drenched in sex. Why is that? That dude that wouldn't put out. This post here. Have you ever tried taking a slightly different approach when it comes to guys? Maybe a "wait until its been three dates before sex" rule? I don't know...but I think some boundaries for you would help a lot.
I'm only saying this because I used to think like you. It was sex first, then romanticism later. My only problem was I never really experienced the romanticism. Plus with HIV rates they are, sex should definitely be limited to those you trust.
So yea, now a days, it seems like I get more quality, more passion, and more grown men. I'm telling you, not having sex right away weeds out so much bullshit and trivial scenarios that you couldn't avoid any other way.
ADAM, I ki-ed, I died, I rolled off my bed, this was all very funny, yet introspective, as usual, I lived, until I read the conclusion.
I think you should tell him that you are not interested, that he cut you off in the past, and you do not want to bothered. Having him call, basically, leashing him along for the ride is LATE, tired, and you know better.
I understand revenge, but when does getting revenge for something like getting played by a prospective date become immature? NOW! LOL.
Seriously, what he did was dead wrong, and what you are doing in response to his indiscretions might make you feel good for now, however, just know karma is the worst kind of bitch.
Vindication does feel good. That is the right term isnt it? I'm not sure I would have had the same thoughts but the feeling... is priceless.
I think Chaz is right that tellin dude wassup directly is preferable.
But, I gotta say, when you dealin wit HOs who playin games like these two seem to be, sometimes havin a nice lil chit-chat and spillin ya heart about how ya feelins was hurt back in the day don't quite cut it. Some folks take _any_ response, positive or negative, as a sign of interest. Some folks really do think everybody else in the world is as silly as they themselves is and that everybody spend all their time thinkin up ways to run head games on everybody else. Yall is smart boys so I know yall know all this already. But I'm just gently suggestin that Adam mighta figured not respondin sent the most clear signal. No mixed messages. Over and done wit.
Okay, They are reaping what he sowed. The harvest is good now and he wants a piece of it... Sweet Honey in the Rock....Too bad, so sad. I like the way you handle both situations. Me, my mean Leo spirit ass would have done some shit that I would have to reap....Great attitude about them.
That was cold but he deserved it in the end. Job will done!
usually when time passes and a person realizes they passed up a good thing, they wonder what it would be like and think about trying to get "it" again. I kinda feel like you, when that happens, if you served me shade, i'm not gonna give you anything much. So i dont blame you.