The Two Minute Bottom aka "Damn, I Ain't Even Hardly Get It In Yet..."

A common complaint from bottoms and even straight women about having sex with a man is that sometimes a lot of men seem to cum too fast during sex, leaving them unsatisfied and over it. Lately I've been noticing that this issue has been manifesting itself in my sex life as well, but in my case it's the other way around. If something happens to me once, it's a fluke, twice, it's a coincidence, three times, it's a phenomenon. Ladies and gentlemen and all others in between I introduce to you, the two minute bottom.

Unlike a lot of tops I've heard of, I'm totally into pleasing my bottom. I get off on their pleasure. More often than not, about eighty-five, ninety percent of the time, when I'm fucking the bottom always cums first. In fact with one of my exes I used to make him cum first EVERY TIME we had sex. When people ask me why I'm so selfless in the bedroom I explain to them my reasoning for it, which in some ways can actually seem kinda selfish.

Number one: Like I said before, I totally get off on the moans, and the yells, and even the screams of my partner and if you've got somebody moaning, yelling and screaming long enough, they're gonna cum.

Number two: If we're fucking and I make you cum first I then don't have to worry about you when I'm ready to cum. Because when I cum I'mma wanna go to sleep or at least rest for a little bit. I'm not gonna wanna turn over and lick your nipples or jerk you off or play with your ass, whatever you need to make you cum. After all that hard work, heaving and pumping, tryna fuck you a nigro is tired. If I can get you taken care of all I gotta do for me is jerk off a little. it's not like I wasn't close and just holding out on my shit for you anyway so a couple of strokes and I'm done too and now we can both rest and avoid the wet spot until our lazy asses are ready take a shower.

Number three: Nothing makes you feel more like the mothafuckin' man than to make your shawty cum so hard his legs are shaking.

Number four: If you can master one, two, and three you can always keep him coming back for more. Do you know how many people I've messed around with in the past still want me to fuck them regardless of the fact that we're not together anymore and don't hardly speak? it's crazy.

I just totally went off subject there. Anyway, ummm yeah so if I ever get the chance to fuck you I'm gonna try my very best to make you cum first. The only downside to this is that lately it seems that I've been making them cum a little too quick. And you know once that bottom cums any fucking after that is a wrap. That hole tightens up and my once oh-so-pleasurable dick starts to feel like a hot cactus and its time to pull out.

There was this guy, lets call him Jackson. Jackson and I carried on an illicit affair a while back. He had someone and I had someone. I know, I know, it's horrible and terrible, we were cheating on our boyfriends, yes it was wrong, but fortunately this thread isn't about cheating on boyfriends so we can get back to that later. So I'm at Jackson's place, we're messing around and then his body just starts shaking.

"What happened?"

"I just came..."

"But I didn't even put my dick in yet..."

He wasn't even jerking off or nothing, it was the strangest thing. I should have been a little tight about that because I really did wanna fuck that day but I took solace in the fact that I must have been the mothafuckin' man. I made the nigga nutt and I hardly touched him.

There was this other guy, lets call him Daniel. Daniel was I guess was what you'd consider a vers-top. I had my reservations but he wanted me to fuck him. He said he hadn't taken dick in a long time and that something about me just wanted to make him do it. He was fine too, so I agreed to fuck him. After some foreplay, him sucking my dick, me eating his ass, some bump and grind, etc., he laid on his back while I slid it in real slow. He was kinda tight but taking it okay, well actually better than okay. As I went in deeper and deeper he started to get real excited, moaning and shit and then he grabbed for his dick. As I'm just getting all the way in, hitting rock bottom and pulling back to stroke he came. Kinda hoping that maybe even though he came he could take a little more dick I reluctantly asked:

"You want me to take it out?"

"Yeah"

He answered with his face all screwed up, cactus syndrome had already sat in. So i slowly pulled out, flung the condom to the floor laid back and stroked my cactus until I came. I ain't gon lie, this time I was a little tight. Being inside him was feeling all good and then it's suddenly snatched away. Damn! Damn, me and this good dick!

Finally there was Ralph. Me and Ralph had tried to have sex before but I just was not fitting in. Ralph, who was also not used to taking dick, was tight, tighter than a baby tee on Dolly Parton, just tight. After not seeing each other for a while I chilled again with Ralph. I could tell from when I was eating him out that Ralphie was a little more open than before, not too much, but a little more. He says that I'm the only one who's ever been close to being inside him. I didn't believe that shit but all that mattered was that I was there right then about to hit it.

I tried to enter him from behind and it wasn't really working. So then he laid on his back and I tried it that way. Finally after all this time I was getting in. As I slid in deeper he began to moan and grab for his dick, just then I flung his hand away from it as I tried to slip in deeper. As soon as I got back into concentrating on what I was doing I felt his body shaking and it was a wrap. He came. I only got half of my dick inside and he came. What the fuck?

Now I was heated. I tried my best to stay cool, I mean, I know it wasn't his fault, he couldn't help it, but it wasn't working. The aggravation in my face must have started to show. I pulled out, flung the condom and laid on my back, jerking my dick begrudgingly until I came. After a few minutes I got over my unsatisfaction and at the end of the day I was glad to have satisfied him and I know I pretty much insured that I was gonna be able to hit it again but damn. Now I know how my female readers feel.

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Playing In The Background...
"One Minute Man (video version)" feat. Ludacris and Trina
Missy Elliott
from the album "Miss E... So Addictive"
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PS: This is totally sidebar, but you bottoms out there who don't cum or don't think it's necessary to cum during or as a result of sex, what's with that? I don't get it. Y'all need to enjoy sex too dammit!