Yes, y'all you read right, I'm going to speak at Yale this Saturday. A while back I was contacted by the Black Solidarity Conference at Yale University to speak in a panel discussion this Saturday, February 28th. I've actually known about this for about a month now and am just posting it today (don't cuss me out too loud y'all). The discussion is called "Disrobed: An Exposé of Black Sexuality" Here's a little blurb on it:

Disrobed: An Exposé of Black Sexuality
Black sexuality has and continues to occupy a peculiar space in the American imagination. Our goal is to examine and engage critically the many historical and contemporary notions that form popular conceptions of black sexuality. With our diverse panelists, we aim to discuss the issue from multiple vantage points with hopes to deconstruct and dismantle the numerous negative and false images as well as illuminate the oft neglected positive iterations of black sexuality.

As far as I know I'm gonna be joined by YouTube personality B. Scott and Terrance Dean, the author of "Hiding In Hip Hop", but I think there will be others.

For info on all the other events of the weekend and how you can attend, check out the official Yale Black Solidarity Conference website at:
http://yale.edu/bsc

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Playing In The Background...
"Let's Talk About Sex"
by Salt-N-Pepa
from the album "Blacks' Magic"
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Posted by Adam Benjamin Irby at 11:41 AM | Permalink | Comments (11) | TrackBacks (0)

In the midst of the stressful ass week I've been having I totally forgot that the second anniversary of the blog was this past Sunday, February 22nd. When I look back over the past two years I see that sooooooo much has changed. I have changed. But what hasn't changed is the love and support I get from you all.

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.

This blog would be nothing without you.

Love y'all much.
-Adam

Posted by Adam Benjamin Irby at 01:20 AM | Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBacks (0)

A few weeks ago I was asked again to appear on "Mocha Lounge", an online talk show hosted by Rob Smith (of "I Want To Work For Diddy" fame).

The show is simulcast on the LOGO Network's AfterElton.com and The Mocha Lounge Blog.

In this appearance I am joined by my good friend Dwight Allen O'Neal, writer and Producer of the "Christopher Street TV" series. We talked about Black History Month, with an emphasis on Black Gay history and what's coming up in black gay pop culture in 2009.

Check it out and lemme know what you think:

Posted by Adam Benjamin Irby at 09:12 AM | Permalink | Comments (4) | TrackBacks (0)

I'm tired, but I'm blessed.

As y'all know I'm working again. I'm Overnight Supervisor of my hotel and it's great. I didn't realize how much I missed the industry being away from it for so long. I'm doing great at the job, implementing all kinds of new stuff and thinking outside of the box to get certain tasks accomplished. The people I work with, those that work under me and over me really like me. It's like working with famiy, we all try to help each other out where we can.

Of course, given my position I work at night and am basically living my life backwards, working when most people are asleep and asleep when most people are working. Although I'm somewhat used to it from doing it before it has been kicking my ass a bit. I've got to make sure that I sleep adequately during the day or else I'm gonna be dead tired at work. So many people are mad at me right now because I don't pick up the phone like I used to but, these are hard times. A brova gotta do what a brova gotta do.

As you know, we're in a financial crisis right now and although this new job is such a blessing and the hospitality industry is doing remarkably well in spite of these hard times it's certainly not totally recession proof. Due to the fact that we simply aren't making the money this year that we made this time last year (I know that for myself. I'm an auditor and I see the numbers.) they've been forced to cut costs, a good portion of those cuts being payroll. The desk agents have had their hours cut and to fill in for some of that time, supervisors like me, who work on salary won't have our salaries cut (Thank you Jesus.) but we now have to now work six days a week instead of five for the next several weeks of our slow season. I'm not complaining though, it's an adjustment, but at least I'm working, working at a job that I happen to love. I'm blessed. I'm not home much, but I'm blessed.

A second job opportunity in the industry seems to be presenting itself and if I'm able to get that as a means of secondary income I'm gonna do that too at least for a little while. This financial thing out here is real and I'm tryna stack as much paper as I can. I'm tryna be debt free by next year. I want a new apartment, I want savings, I wanna finish college. So many new hotels are opening up in the New York market later this year and next year and I want a promotion. Right now I'm in the midst of sculpting my five year plan, where I want to be professionally by the time I'm 30. 

Anyway, lemme stop boring y'all talking about work.

Love y'all,
Adam

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Playing In The Background...
"Moneyright"
by Musiq Soulchild
from the album "On My Radio"
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PS: Basically, everybody at my job knows that I'm gay and they're all cool about it, as they should be. :)

Posted by Adam Benjamin Irby at 05:42 PM | Permalink | Comments (5) | TrackBacks (0)

Check out my review of Ryan Leslie's self-titled US debut album at TheBleuMag.com.

Be sure to comment and what not.

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Playing In The Background...
"Valentine"
by Ryan Leslie
from the album "Ryan Leslie"
and
"Addiction"
feat. Cassie and Fabolous
by Ryan Leslie
from the album "Ryan Leslie"
==========

Posted by Adam Benjamin Irby at 05:26 PM | Permalink | Comments (1) | TrackBacks (0)

In honor of the message thread that has taken Facebook by storm, so much so that there was even an article the USA today about it, I've decided to post my "25 Random Things About Me." This is kinda like a continuation of a post I wrote last year entitled "10 Things You Probably Didn't Know About Adam That Have Absolutely Nothing To Do With Sex:"

Here's my list:

01. I hate the sight of peeling paint. I know it's weird, but it grosses me out.

02. My iPod is meticulously organized. Every artist and album name must be 100% correct (no duplicates). If I find something that isn't correct I will write it down and the next time I get to a computer I will correct it.

03. When I'm listening to music I can't switch from like a raunchy rap song to a Gospel song or vice-versa. Like, I can't just jump from Lil' Kim to Kirk Franklin I gotta throw and R&B or pop song in the middle as a buffer.

04. There's a corner in the hallway of my building right past my apartment door and I ALWAYS check around it EVERY TIME I walk in my door, just to check if God forbid there's some bad person standing there. I've been in my apartment for two and a half years, I would have to have done this thousands of times. Maybe it's the native New Yorker in me or maybe I'm just that paranoid.

05. I hate collarless dress shirts my mother used to buy them for me as kid and I will never, ever wear one again.

06. Every time I go to a restaurant I almost always sit facing the door.

07. When I'm sitting for an extended period of time my right leg starts twitching and it's totally unconscious.

08. I don't like to celebrate my birthday after my birth date, it just feels weird to me. I could have a celebration weeks before and be fine, but not even a day after.

09. I spell the word theatre the British way, "theatre" when I'm writing about Broadway theatre or any other type of stage show, but I spell it the American way, "theater". when I'm writing about a movie theater.

10. I hate peanuts, okra and American cheese.

11. I always sleep on my back with my arms folded across me like a dead person, unless I'm cuddling with someone.

12. I use a measuring cup to measure the 1 cup of sugar I put in my pitcher of Kool-Aid while most black folks I know just wing it.

13. When I go to fast food restaurants if I'm having a fountain drink I usually have them make it half drink/half water because fountain drinks tend to be too sweet for me.

14. The sexiest thing to me about a man is how big his heart is. No bullshit. A nice guy can win me every time.

15. My blood pressure is lower than most normal people.

16. I'll take new Mariah ("Butterfly" and onward) over old Mariah anyday.

17. Unlike most people, I was never really into Michael Jackson like that.

18. I'm late for just about everything. I just can't help it. My friends lie and tell me that stuff is gonna happen a half hour earlier than it is just so I can show up on time.

19. I can't do anything unless I know explicitly why I'm doing it.

20. One of my dreams growing up was to be on MTV's "The Real World" but now I'm too old.

21. I'm more judgmental than I let people think I am.

22. I think I'm terrible at speaking in public so I tend to hide behind my blog.

23. I masturbate twice a day most days but even on my busiest of days I'm always able to get one session in. People who don't masturbate scare me, all that pent up aggression... LOL

24. I tend to look people straight into their eyes when I'm talking to them.

25. I can't stay mad long, I forgive fairly easily and I can't hold a grudge to save my life. Granted, I'm not stupid. If you try to play me I'm not gonna fuck with you anymore, but that don't mean I can't least say "Hi" and make small talk if I see you out somewhere.

26. Unlike most people I don't have a celebrity crush. There is no celebrity I know of that I'm really sexually attracted to.

27. When no one's looking, I pick my nose... a lot. Fuck Kleenex.

28. And I bite my nails. I know it's totally gross but I can't stop myself.

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Playing In The Background...
"About Me"
by Utada
from the album "Exodus"
=========

Posted by Adam Benjamin Irby at 06:00 AM | Permalink | Comments (11) | TrackBacks (0)

This has been such a crazy week. I've been like super busy. Well, as you know I've been at my new job for a couple of weeks now. I absolutely love my job, I'm so blessed. It's like this job was created just for me, actually it kinda was as I am the first person to have held my position at my job. So yes, it was created just for me. I enjoy the work I do and I even get along with everybody. It's a perfect fit and I'm so grateful. At my job I'm a new supervisor, supervising people who have been there much longer than I have, some of which have never had to deal with a supervisor before. Normally this would be a recipe for disaster, but it's all worked out so beautifully (Thanks again Mr. Jesus).

The only minor issue I'm having is that now that I'm working back in the hotel business again me and Chester, Chet, my boo, have opposite schedules. I'm the Overnight Supervisor at my hotel and Chet works during the day at his job like normal people. Our jobs are actually walking distance from each other, it's just that we're never at them at the same time. During the week we don't see each other like we used to and although we spend basically every night sleeping in the same bed, either at his place or mine, it's not too often that we get to sleep in that bed at the same. It's like, when I'm coming from work he's going to work and when he gets home from work I'm asleep, about to wake up and get ready for work, leaving us hardly any snuggle time if any at all. It's like we're two ships passing in the evening. And sex, forget about it, we've basically relegated that to a weekend activity, although sometimes he may give me a little somethin' somethin' before I leave for work some nights and that's never a bad thing, definitely puts a spring in my step. I feel like we're running a relay race. He comes in from work with the baton, passes it to me and I run back out with it.

Yesterday, rather the day before yesterday was even worse, we didn't see each other at all. I left work Tuesday morning as he was on his way to work. I slept all day and I had to wake up that evening to film another episode of "The Mocha Lounge" with Rob Smith, he had me and Dwight Allen O'Neal as guests (that should be coming out in the next week or so). From there I went straight to work and then yesterday morning right after I left work, while Chet was of course going to work, I spent the day at Starbucks on my laptop working (I work much better at Starbucks than I do at home. At home I say I'm gonna work, but I always just end up taking a nap.), finishing up the website for Bleu Magazine, getting it ready for its relaunch. I stayed downtown all day doing that just so I'd be able to meet up with Chet after he got off work. I had to see him. We were texting and chatting on Yahoo all day talking about how much we missed each other. I know that it's not a big deal, and I sound a little whiny, but I missed a whole day with my baby. We ate together and headed back uptown so that I could take a catnap before work.

Our schedule thing, although marginally inconvenient isn't the biggest deal in the world. It's not an insurmountable odd, just a hurdle in this race of love we're running together. Lawd, that was corny. LOL Yeah, we whine to each other and are babies about it at times, but we're both adults and know that sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do. This situation definitely makes us appreciate the time we do have together though, which is still quite considerable. It's not like we're living in different states or something. Our ships have been passing each other all week long, but trust and believe that this ship will be docking into port all weekend long if ya know what I mean. ;)

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Playing In The Background...
"Sobeautiful"
by Musiq Soulchild
from the album "On My Radio"
==========

PS: Thanks to everyone who left such nice comments when I changed my relationship status on Facebook.

PPS: For those of you wondering why I call my boyfriend "Chester". Chester is the name of the county he was born in and one of our favorite presidents is Chester A. Arthur.

Posted by Adam Benjamin Irby at 04:48 AM | Permalink | Comments (4) | TrackBacks (0)