Recently in Poetry Category

==========
This is one of my favorite poems so I decided to repost it. How many times have we let someone get away with treating us not as good as we deserve to be just because they look good or we think that we're not on their level and are in a sense grateful for being in their presence, as though we aren't good enough. It doesn't even have to be looks that make you stay, it could be about the way he makes you feel or the sex or a combination of the three. What's even worse is when we know it's true and we try to rationalize the shit.

Enjoy.

Originally posted on November 10, 2007 11:12 AM
==========

If He Was Ugly
by Adam Benjamin Irby

If he was ugly...
Would you let him do the things he do?
Would you let him say what he say to you?
Or act the way he acted,
If you weren't so attracted.
And forgive so automatic.
And live life so tragic.
The longing for better days, you trade,
Your sense, you're like an addict.
Why's he such a prize,
Just a sight for sore eyes.
Telling yourself lies,
Under the guise of compromise.
Disdain in your brain,
Numb like Novocaine.
You fold in your pain, like a collar stain,
On a white collared Polo rugby.
Would you treat him so lovely,
If you didn't think you were so ugly?

==========
Playing In The Background...
"Why You Gotta Look So Good?" feat. Lloyd Banks
by Mya
from the album "Moodring"
==========

Nigga On The Side
by Adam Benjamin Irby

Can I truly be happy as just the nigga on the side,
Just a piece, a jumpoff, a temporary slide?
A guilty pleasure, an addiction, an aberration you try to hide,
The one you see when you got needs that can't be filled by your "perfect" guy.

If he's so damn perfect,
Then why doesn't he treat you better?
Make you feel half as good as I did,
When we were together?

I made you smile, I made you laugh,
Said I knew your body like second nature.
People stay talking shit about me,
And he looks better on paper.

Break up to make up,
Arguments, rendezvous, texts on the telephone.
If he's so all of that,
How come you can't never leave me alone?

Friends don't know where you are,
I'm the one you're coming to see.
He may have your time,
But I'm getting the pussy.

You pick me up, you put me down,
You string me along, you ain't slick.
I can't front, I had my part in it too,
But now I'm sick of it.

He treats you bad, I treat you good,
I'm the habit you just can't kick.
He's got all the prestige,
And I got a big 'ol dick.

Can I truly be happy as just the nigga on the side,
Just a piece, a jumpoff, a temporary slide?
A guilty pleasure, an addiction, an aberration you try to hide,
Hell no, I gotta go, I have nothing, if not my pride.

==========
Playing In The Background...
"Leave Me Alone"
by Syleena Johnson
from the album "Chapter 3: The Flesh"
and
"No Happy Holidays"
by Mary J. Blige
from the album "Mary"
and
"Mr. Mistress"
by Ari Gold
from the album "Transport Systems"
==========

Strange
by Adam Benjamin Irby

Isn't it strange how I'm visiting a stranger,
Walking down a strange street.
In a strange neighborhood, in a strange part of town,
Is this stranger I'm gonna meet.

Isn't it strange how 2 hours ago he didn't know my name,
Yet he's sucking on my dick right now just the same.
And how I can flip him over and steady his frame,
Pounding and stroking until I came.
So numb I don't even think about it no more,
'Cuz that's just the name of the game.

Isn't it strange, the slight feeling of blunder,
Once the cum is all shot, to hear him wonder.
"Pa, am I gonna see you again?"
I answer "Well, you got my number."
Knowing good and well "Do Not Answer"
Is what his number's saved under.

==========
Playing In The Background...
"Fling"
by Girls Aloud
from the album "Tangled Up"
==========

No.
by Adam Benjamin Irby

So smart, so powerful,
So strong, yet true,
So clear, so concise,
Telling you what I won't do.

So potent, so forceful,
So real, so brave,
So defiant, non-compliant,
Telling you how I will no longer behave.

So fearless, so apparent,
So timely, yet long overdue,
Nowadays I'm finding,
It's become so much easier to say no to you.

==========
Playing In The Background...
"No Fool No More"
by EnVogue
from the album "The Best Of EnVogue"
and
"No"
by Kandice Love
from the album "Def Jam's Rush Hour 2 Movie Soundtrack"
and
"Unappreciated"
by Cherish
from the album "Unappreciated"
and
"Fool 4 You"
by Cherish
from the album "Unappreciated"
==========

Sometimes
by Adam Benjamin Irby

Sometimes I wish I weren't the way I am,
Just didn't care, didn't give a damn.

Sometimes I wish I didn't think so much,
Considering all feelings and possibilities and such.

Sometimes I wish I were like everyone else,
Going with the flow, dealing with the cards dealt.

Sometimes I wish I weren't so right about you being so wrong,
Know what you weren't gonna do before you didn't do it,
And so on, and so on.

Sometimes I wish I were you and you were me,
Then, just then, you may finally see.

I would do my thing and just do me,
And you would be sitting home typing poetry.

==========
Playing In The Background...
"Borderline"
by Madonna
from the album "Madonna"
and
"Time"
by Syleena Johnson
from the album "Chapter 3 - The Flesh"
==========

===========
Hey,

My poetry comes to me unexpectedly and fast like lightening strikes. Most of my poems only take like five or ten minutes to write, inspiration is crazy. I'm here in my crib, alone on a Friday night, washing my dishes, listening to Chaka Khan wail the hell outta "Angel" when this poem came to me. I had to let the water run, scramble for a pen and run to my notebook. This poem, like all me poems describes what I'm going through right now. Even though it's pretty black and white, you won't get the full understanding of how this poem applies to me until I write my next dating update blog post, a dating update that I'm afraid to write.

You know how I always say that things aren't real until you write them down and that your mind can always reason your way out if doing something or accepting something until it's on paper, in black and white, starting right at you. Well I'm happy now and I'm afraid that as sure as I write that down that I'll jinx it. I'd rather have my happiness bubble burst before and deal with it quickly and privately than to write a blog post about it, tell the world, still have it burst and then I'll feel like an asshole. But I can't hold it in anymore. It's not like I haven't eaten my words here before but no matter how many times I've had to endure the pungent flavor of my declarations, they don't taste any better with repetition. I guess the more cynical part of me is waiting for the proverbial ax to fall, hence the poem. I guess I did kinda explain things, huh?

Shout out to Steve from Blueberry Hill for always being supportive of my poetry. :)

Enjoy.
==========

Prepared
by Adam Benjamin Irby

You say you want me, but it's still hard to believe
You say you didn't mean to hurt me, but it's so hard to receive
Hardening my heart, my only reprieve
Just in case you decide to leave
Again

You say you understand, you say you've grown
That's why even when I told you to, you never fully let me alone
So much I had to give you, so much inside of me
I could love you better than him, but you just didn't wanna see

You say it's the past, you understand, you want me to trust
You're here now, I'm here now, let's take it slow, let's become us
You're sorry for hurting me, communication is a must
Let's keep it real, how we feel, don't hold it in, let's discuss

It's easy for you, you're not the one who cried
Pitiful, miserable, broken inside
You walked away, went about your day, so easy to say goodbye
I sigh

I let it go, it helped me grow, I'm not even mad
I'm different now, you're different now, there's no need to feel bad
Run into my arms, I've always been here for you, let's rekindle what we had

Watching you sleep, so peaceful, so angelic, so serene
Wondering how the fuck you could ever be so motherfuckin' mean
Is this real, real for real, or is this just a passing mood
Or are you really ready for something real and tired of playing with these wack ass dudes?

I mean, I hear what you're sayin'
You say you're not playin'
But a part of me will always wonder if were only delaying
The inevitable, the push and the pull, your black ass not staying

For now I'ma chill, I'ma enjoy this moment, live in the now, enjoy each day
But I already know what I'll wear, I already know what I'll say
I already know what I'll do, I'ma be prepared this time, if decide you walk away
Again

DAMN, WHY IS THIS LOVE SHIT PERPETUALLY FUCKED THE FUCK UP?

==========
Playing In The Background...
"Hurt Again"
by Mary J. Blige
from the album "Growing Pains"
and
"Careful"
by En Vogue
from the album "Soul Flower"
and
"Angel"
by Chaka Khan
from the album "Funk This"
===========

==========
I was talking to Pubby about relationships today and why mine never seem to work and in the midst of everything the person told me that the reason why guys probably don't see me as the relationship type is because I give off a strong flirtatious, sexual aura to people when they first meet me. I had to agree that I do and a lot of it I do unconsciously. People even say that about the pictures on the website. What's even funnier was that I was chosen as "Man Of The Month" for an online magazine. I did the photo shoot yesterday and that's gonna be another round of sexy pictures on the site. I guess that part of it is my fault but I gotta promote myself, right? My hope is that the pictures get people here but the words will make them stay.

How I long for the day, for the man who will love me for what's inside my heart. I just finished this poem that I'm gonna share with you all. As I wrote it about two and a half tears streamed down my face. I'm so fucking mad because I am really not the type to cry, but I couldn't help it. As I have said before, it's so easy to write about sex and fucking and all that other graphic shit. It's writing about my feelings and insecurities that's the hardest. So here it is.

Enjoy.
==========

Behind These Bedroom Eyes...
by A. Benjamin Irby

(Addressed to the man of my dreams, whoever he may be.)

**clears throat**

Behind these bedroom eyes there's a kind and gentle soul.
One that could give you everything if you only cared to know.
There's so many layers, so much more than what you see.
So much more for you to explore deep inside of me.

Behind these bedroom eyes I'm more than just for play.
I can be a whole lot of fun tonight but such more if you were to stay.
I wanna be around for more than just a week.
Unlock the secrets of my heart and I'll be yours to keep.

Behind these bedroom eyes there's a scared little boy.
Doing what he can, trying to be a man, using whatever he can employ.
Trying to patch up wounds inside his heart that were never truly sewn.
Grabbing on to branches, taking chances, deathly afraid of being alone.

Behind these bedroom eyes I wanna fall in love.
Just wanna be the one you need like I was sent from above.
Don't believe all that you've heard, let me tell you how I feel.
I know I have a checkered past but this time the feeling's real.

Behind these bedroom eyes I love to see you smile.
My heart skips a beat every time we meet, baby please stay for a while.
I'd would give up anything just to be with you tonight.
Your touch, your feel, it feels so real and I know that it's right.

Baby if you take a chance you will be surprised.
At what you find, right behind my bedroom eyes.

==========
Playing In The Background...
"Heaven Sent"
by Keyshia Cole
from the album "Just Like You"
and
"The Wound"
by Jazzyfatnastees
from the album "The Once And Future"
==========
==========

==========
With this post I'm christening yet another category for the blog, the "Poetry" category. The first things I ever wrote were poetry and songs. I have been writing them since I learned how to write. Oddly enough, there isn't much of my poetry on this blog. There's only one other poem that I've put up here (click here to read that one). My poetry, like my writing is always inspired by real life events. I feel something and they just flow. Most of my poems take probably at most like an hour to write, some I'll write in five or ten minutes. And they all rhyme, I hate poems that don't rhyme. So from now on anytime I'm feeling poetic I'll post here.

Enjoy.

-Adam
==========

Indifferent
by A. Benjamin Irby

To avoid being hurt, though it's different for me.
Gotta keep my love inside of me.
You wanna do you, I wanna do we.
Even though it hurts, I pretend not to be.
In order to keep my sanity.
I gotta treat you indifferently.

I wanna show my love for all to see.
Give you all I have inside of me.
But you tell me you're not ready.
And this is just the way it's gotta be.
Gotta hold back how I truly feel.
Don't wanna fall for you if it's not real.
Gotta pull back, need time to heal.
Wanna say "I need you babe" but my lips are sealed.

To avoid being hurt, though it's different for me.
Gotta keep my love inside of me.
You wanna do you, I wanna do we.
Even though it hurts, I pretend not to be.
In order to keep my sanity.
I gotta treat you indifferently.

You can call me an actor.
'Cuz I gotta go around playing all these characters.
Inside I'm such a loving man.
But to keep it to myself is so much better than,
To give it to someone who won't appreciate,
So I'll abbreviate, I ain't got no time to waste, and,
I'll take this time to work on me.
Maybe you'll come around, maybe not,
I guess we'll see.

To avoid being hurt, though it's different for me.
Gotta keep my love inside of me.
You wanna do you, I wanna do we.
Even though it hurts, I pretend not to be.
In order to keep my sanity.
I gotta treat you indifferently.

Then you ask me "What's goin' on?"
Why I haven't been myself lately.
I'm not mad just trying to be strong,
Be a little more like you baby.
Can't expect me to call like I used to.
'Cuz you don't feel the same way as I do.
To avoid being hurt, though it's different for me.
I gotta treat you indifferently.

To avoid being hurt, though it's different for me.
Gotta keep my love inside of me.
You wanna do you, I wanna do we.
Even though it hurts, I pretend not to be.
In order to keep my sanity.
I gotta treat you indifferently.

So I guess I'll see you when I see you.
You'll see me when you see me too.
'Cuz that's the way you want it to be.
Maybe indifferent is just too different for me?

==========
Playing In The Background...
"Get Mine, Get Yours"
by Christina Aguilera
from the album "Stripped"
==========

This poem is based on a true story. I just came home from the gym about a half hour ago. I was actually trying to get home as fast as I could so I could get this poem that popped into my mind out on paper. I won't tell you much about it as it speaks for itself. I'm showing a new side of me as this poem has nothing to do with dating or relationships or sex. It actually only took me about five minutes to write. It's different for me. Enjoy.

The Big Ass Raccoons Of Central Park
by A. Benjamin Irby

(clears throat)

As I was walking home this evening,
walking home from the gym.
My baby on my mind,
I was thinking of him.
Groceries in hand,
I stopped by the store.
The grass and the moonlight,
as I walked by the shore.
Of Harlem Meer,
a big pond in north Central Park.
Oh dear, I fear,
a rustling in the dark.
In the dim streetlights,
and the light from the moon.
I look to the right,
a big ass raccoon!
Hairy, kinda scary,
wildlife, but pretty.
What a peculiar sight in the middle of New York City.
I walk unfazed,
a chuckle, a laugh.
By all the young lovers,
sitting poised, ready to have.
Rounding the meer,
almost near Lenox Avenue real soon.
Ahead to the right in the garbage,
another big ass raccoon!
Animals, wild animals,
really it's too much.
First pigeons, then geese,
now raccoons and such.
In the path, make a decision,
no "wells" or "maybes."
I'm turning around,
I ain't tryna get no rabies!
So with the bags I had,
turning around to part.
I'm getting my black ass outta Central Park!